Tuesday, April 29, 2008

there's a song that's inside of my soul

I wrote this on February 7, 2006 in sophomore year of college for a religion class. It's amazing how I still feel this way about God, a little more than two years later.


In my experiences, God has always been (and still is) a constant in my life. He is a spiritual being that dwells in my heart as well as appears in everything around me. He is always there, making sure I am following the path he has chosen for my life. I see and feel God in many ways – in my parents, in the friends I see every day, and in daily activities. God is everything to me. He is the air I breathe and the scents I smell; he is the music I play and the music I listen to. He is the life-long friends I’ve made and the strangers I will meet. God is all around me: in people, in objects, in thoughts and ideas. To me, God does not have a face or a body, because he comes in all different forms. There is the popular belief that God is Jesus and vice versa. While on some degree I believe that, I also disagree with that belief. God appears in different forms, different ways, and in different people that I meet every day.

I feel God daily in my life a lot, but I especially feel him when I think about my grandparents (Oma and Opa), and when I think about music. Some people might be angry with God when a loved one dies, and I admit, I have felt that way before. But I also thank God that they are not suffering anymore, and I feel that it was His decision that they belonged in a better place. I feel God when I am with Oma, my grandmother. She is such an amazing and strong woman, and she took care of Opa for the last couple of years of his life, when he was sick. They were both people of faith, and Opa tried to go to go to mass for as long as he was able to, even when his accessibility was in a wheel chair. They both have strong beliefs and values of the Catholic faith, and have always set great examples for their children and grandchildren. After my Opa passed away, Oma became an even stronger person because of her faith in God, and it has reflected upon me, as well as other members in my family. Every time that I spend time with her, I feel God’s presence with us, in her life and in mine.

Every time I am performing music, I feel God’s presence in my life as well. I believe that God gave me the gift of music, and I try to use it to the best of my abilities, because I know that is what he would want for me. Performing is an incredible feeling, and I feel that God is usually right there beside me when I’m playing an instrument for an audience. I believe that it is God who is able to give me that feeling of accomplishment; that my belief in him helps to trigger the sense of feeling that I have reached out to someone in the audience that I perform for.

I believe that I am here in this world for a reason. I am not quite sure yet what that reason is, but I am on a continuous search to find out. I think that every day, I learn another small bit of information on why I am actually here, and why God has created me. God has a plan for me, and I hope that I am able to carry out that life according to his plan in the grand scheme of life.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008